Home Movies S4E01 Everyone's Entitled to My Opinion

anyway so WWV wiener or winner dot-com

said that heeling buffoon was a bad

movie yeah and helium buffoon was a

great movie you love those stupid movies

I do but this one wasn't stupid

you know Brendon you don't have to say

www anymore what I can just say the

website name without the www that's how

you type it in Melissa www that's how

you type it but you don't have to say it

if you said to me movie winner winner

com I would know what you meant

without the www so no double use effort

okay Brendon for the sake of this

conversation you don't have to say www

because I know what it is okay so does

rest of the world but anyway like I was

saying I'm thinking of writing my own

review and sending it in because I was

not happy with they wrote I think

well I know I mean I'm saying I'm

definitely thinking maybe possibly don't

it's a good idea well I said that maybe

I might you know you won't excuse me are

we doing all right here or what you guys

chatting it up uh-huh having a nice

chitchat mmm be nice fine

not our best a little back and forth

little tete-a-tete

little dialogue yeah what are you guys

talking about soccer

no because there's a game going on I was

wondering whether you'd like to

participate in the game is our soccer

game bothering your conversation and

gather round

we should light a campfire so you guys

could tell your stories spin your tails

no regalis Brendon and Melissa coach

have a seat relax yeah why bother

getting stressed out it's a pretty quiet

game yeah well I kind of forgot we were

playing actually hey what do you think

is after school assembly thing is all

about I don't know I hate after school

assemblies rumor I heard is that

principal plum was fired and mr. Lynch

is gonna be the new interim principal

mr. Lynch mr. Lynch Lynch is about as

qualified to run a school as this soda

can I can say that because I'm his best

friend I know you and Lynch were best

friends coach well we're not I'm his

best friend but he's not mine who's your

friend right now to tie between this guy

I write to on the web is from Sri Lanka

he's nice and this guy who hangs out at

the bar I go to who was gonna supposedly

get me a free battery for my car but man

Lynch I'm sorry but there is no way and

how Lynch is gonna beat your new

principal well yes that's what I was

going to say you didn't let me finish as

interim principal

look I said interim principal what's

your problem principals as its rim

principal I intend to turn fairies and

soft even though my hands are cut anyway

I I can't all right Lynch my buddy

I heard that bastards

okay let's see what we got hmm

dear WWE winner or winner calm so in

conclusion yes yes I know it's a funny

way to start a review but as far as I'm

concerned can seem concerned as far as

I'm concerned there is no argument

Helium buffoon is a funny smart clever

hilarious feel-good high-energy

tearjerker that takes us on a crazy

edge-of-your-seat ride through the world

of balloon delivery guys and turns it

into a crazy world of the food delivery

guys when JEB suddenly has to take over

the business yeah

hey John you're taking up two spaces

yeah so what I don't want my car

scratched hello you can't do that why

don't you tell it to the principal

four-eyes boy I didn't expect to use up

the first 25 minutes of class answering

one question but it was a very good

question bread that thanks I have I have

another question - hey think hey class

what's up what do you teach Fink IT

science right yes I got to borrow your

Bunsen burner I want to burn some stuff

in my office hey about that one

hey kids no practice today the coach we

have a game so no game today how come

because I got to pick up a brand new

free battery from my best friend who

works at the automotive shop McGuirk I

can't have you wreaking havoc at my name

like this Lynch what are you gonna do

huh punish me make me stand in the

corner

I'm gonna call my daddy you're making me

look bad in the Kirk what else you gonna

do huh Lynch you gonna spank me Oh spank

me spank me McGuirk yeah there it is

Spanky oh stop

come on spank aah oh my Gert come on

relax buddy I'm just having a little fun

you know you gotta lighten up Lynch all

right you're the man now this could be

fun just gotta take advantage of please

leave I have principal things that I'm

gonna do something let's Rob the safe

here do they have a safe McGirt take the

money we'll go out have a good time

what money equals fun we take the money

and we go have fun McGuirk how old are

you oh I know it can do this is what

we're not gonna do anything can steal

the fire extinguishers oh sure yeah take

all the fire extinguishers out and where

you gonna put them bring them to my

house as spray I met each other that is

a prank that could cause the school to

please get out of my office

how can you not have an opinion on

anything I don't know what do you think

of my new earring I don't know

well then what do you think of my new

hat I don't know what do you mean you

don't know you have to have an opinion

no no I can't nobody cares what I think

well that may be true but you should

still have an opinion you have high

opinion yes see wait that's not in the

script I'm talking about the scripts I

said sighs you're right Brendon you have

to fix this yeah it's stupid yeah but

hold on in a minute guys what are you

doing it's spell checking for the script

now I'm working on something guys

President Lee kind of wanted to finish

this scene we'd like a little direction

you know

do it faster I'm sorry are we

interrupting you by making our little

movie what okay what you just totally

broke my concentration what are you

working on nothing I'm just writing a

review all right WWWE winner winner calm

likes my stuff a lot so they asked me to

write some stuff you're writing a review

for Jovian movie waste guys you don't

have to say www I don't want to have

this conversation again what are you

talking about what it means how do you

know it's her website cuz you say that

calm yeah it's just one of those things

that when something's around for a long

enough time in society you can just

abbreviate what else alright you know I

don't care oh you know what I'm saying

no forget it

you're right in fact don't say wws a

worldwide web every time you say a

website oh that's always a time Lynch

who is gonna stop us you'll run the ship

you're the captain Lynch let go of that

how long I've waited to have someone on

the inside at this school a long time

but Kirk this is not a prison you're

gonna get us both fired let me sit in

the chair get up

what get out you can't sit in the chair

I want to get you if I let you sit in

the chair will you leave maybe it's a

great chair it's a great I love this

chair I have to tell you that I'm gonna

be in your office wait where you going

get over tell me you never wanted to do

this that's not a real that's the only

plant I have I've never had a plant in

my office

Lynch please shut up you're writing for

WWWE winner or winners calm yeah they're

gonna pay me $75 guys you serious uh-huh

let me see that

so in conclusion that's how you start

your review yeah because I have the

final say it's catchy I know that's kind

of annoying brother and then I sign it

movie guy oh that's catchy good annoying

is movie guy your pseudonym no no no

Nance isn't name that I'm using instead

of my real name

the suspense was suspenseful and the

comedy was funny but movie guy says read

the book instead the phone book that is

because it has less characters than this

movie I mean what is it with these

Englishmen alone at the top is the story

of a love triangle among a circle of

friends two best friends torn apart by

success and failure and jealousy and

success movie guy says it's a winner but

leave before the ending because it was

too scary I've never met anyone who

didn't have an opinion

there's nothing in my psychology books

about it there's nothing I can do doc

please don't say that of course I could

call my friend dr. Schwinn Mouser he

could help you I'll call him doc please

I'm desperate I wasn't trying to insult

you doctor I'm just saying that with a

name like footed Mouser I didn't think

I'd be I did ya know so would you be

having an opinion about to be new no an

opinion is a thing to be treasured but

it's good to come out here to mean

anything at all was it funny to his

place and cut big cut go jeez guys guys

hey that scene that was uninspired and

you know though this story held together

you know I've ever seen better acting on

a postage stamp I gotta be honest and

another yeah you're being a jerk yeah

I'm just offering my opinion that's all

you sound like one of your stupid

reviews okay okay I also don't get the

analogy let's the stick turn that way do

you want an opinion on the script

because that is inspired yeah yeah I've

seen better scripts on a postage stamp

yeah that makes more sense

maybe if you spent a little more time on

your scripts and a little less time on

your reviews okay you know whoa come on

let's just take it from Jason sign the

end and action

Brendon can you come here please what do

you want right now

did you find my checks what what what

did you just like what what what nothing

Brendon get up here and explain yourself

alright

so I thought you'd be mad because I'm

just a kid well I wish you'd told me but

no Brendon I think it's great that

you're getting paid for writing reviews

I'm very proud of you

well then you can love this they sent me

press passes to see the premier of all

that violence this Friday night downtown

Brendon that's an r-rated movie do you

better believe it called all that

violence that could be violent

see that's the ironic thing it's not

that violent well I don't want you

knowing about irony

how about nudity I've read about that

movie it sounds absolutely inappropriate

for children yeah but mom you're not

going Brendon I don't want to go trust

me but that's perfect lighting because

I've got a gentleman you're not going

you're not going to a movie named to all

that violence but Jason and Melissa can

go I don't care what Jason and Melissa

can do but their parents probably don't

know that it's called all that violence

until I call and tell them Brendon ever

since we started writing reviews you've

been ignoring your work yeah friends and

and your friends us that's very much our

only difference guys let me say it in a

way that you can understand Brendon

yes www you've been ignoring us calm

nice okay WWWE I'm sorry calm but guys

I'm still taking you the premier I

thought you couldn't go yeah and how are

we gonna get there mama supposed to

drive oh no no no I have an idea

Brendon you're gonna disobey your mother

are we gonna steal a car coach coach I

have a proposition to offer you coach

Brendon get out of my light listen she's

a proposition

yeah all right I'm all yours can you

pick me and Melissa and Jason up on

front it's actually kind of gross I'm

all ears

what if I were all years in you know you

know and can you drive us in the movie

premiers instead of arms years instead

of legs it's just like a lump of ears

coach it was some drunk right now so

that kind of stuff amuses me

coach will you listen to me please hey

listen some listening Brendon I said I

was all ears so you want to ride

somewhere

yeah where movie premiere all right

what's in it for me

oh it's tempting all right I'll do it

what the hell okay

I'll get back in my light I'm burning up

what does it think Lidge what you gotta

do something about the gurke he burst

into my science classes started teaching

again

oh okay quick science lesson alright

don't mix beer with scotch why did that

get no reaction everybody knows what

beer is right yeah everybody knows what

Scotch is don't mix them liquor before

beer never fear beer before liquor throw

up quicker all right think think

everything will be fine I'll take care

of McGuirk let's come on help wait wait

wait I want you to hear something first

what about a boilermaker those are good

isn't that beer and scotch yeah but it's

not one before the other it's together

in one that's okay is there a rhyme for

that yes

attention attention please well mr.

McGuirk please come to the principal's

office immediately thank you so what do

you think do I sound like a principal to

put your hand over your mouth really is

it the way it's supposed to sound I

think it sounds that way because of the

intercoms be cool that's odd okay so we

meet at the soccer field tonight right

and I'm gonna say I'm staying at your

house and what are you telling your mom

I'm saying that I'm going to stay at

Jason's house you can't stay at my house

from there cuz might not go over there

right but I'm not really staying now you

can pretend to stay at my house Brendon

thank you where are you staying I'm

staying at my house with my aunt not

going back I know but where are you

gonna say you are when we're at the

movies we were at the movie and I'll be

at the movies Jason what nothing McGuirk

why are you doing this look what I got

you

McGirt this way you don't have to walk

we don't have to walk all the way to the

lunchroom to get a soda you get one

right here in your office the Kirk that

is for the K also rigged it so they're

free they just come out press wow soda

well that is pretty good I must really

soda that's pretty amazing but the

who loses in this I don't know who the

kids I'm not what they have soda at home

this belongs in their lunchroom okay

well I'm not bringing it back it's too

heavy McGuirk I don't need a soda

machine in my office I don't drink sir

Lynch

please this is like Lynch this is like a

clubhouse just you and me our own

private club no girl is allowed a soda

machine it's great McGuirk if you don't

stop this childish behavior I'm going to

have to do something drastic oh so this

is the thanks I get

why would I be thanking you your cause

being your friend Lynch oh well then yes

this is the thanks you get what are you

talking about well we're friends right

friends steal things for their friends

but Gert you can't keep doing things

like this well I think it's for a

friendship or while I'm doing it tell me

why it's bad it's a bad thing

who says me I'm the principal I am the

principal the people you have to stop

turn around what turn around you're

being very childish turn around

for what as I wanna show you something

all right now what Lynch what are you

wearing under there what what are you

wearing under there Lynch you do not

know what are you wearing under there

underwear underwear the story was just

too hard to follow I've said this about

four and films before if you're gonna go

through all the trouble to make a movie

it may as well make it in English hello

Brendan Oh

mr. Lynch I mean mr. principal I mean

mr. Antrim laid off Brendon then mr.

printer you friended enough how come

you're not hanging out with your friends

uh well I've got some work to do I'm

writing reviews for an online movie

website WWWE wiener or winner calm you

know you don't have to say double 800 is

there something new you know you want no

I just needed to think you know I used

to do my best thinking on the monkey

bars as I remember suspending yourself

from these bars isn't that hard you know

hey hey suspending someone else

especially a friend that's tough am I

being suspended no no not to you Brendan

no it's a it's a faculty member

all right well uh I'll see you see ya

nice talking to you oh crap I don't like

this Brenda

hey there Brenda it's fine it's fine

guys don't work is late he'll be here

geez and I don't want to hear that kind

of stuff okay AUSA I was just going to

say that they found a headlight next to

a body a dead body stop it go ahead that

make jokes but did you know that the

teenagers come here to get drunk on

Friday night how do you know Alyssa my

father buys for them that's illegal

well he says I'm just gonna buy it in a

couple years anyway it makes sense when

he says it oh no I know where to go

Brennan there's nothing worse than

drunken teenagers thanks Jer dad yeah we

can't stay out here we're gonna be eaten

by coyotes and elk elk it's reading

season they're extra dangerous during

the rutting season yeah your father

probably gives him alcohol guys quiet

Shh oh my god oh my god somebody's

coming to kill us

Oh No what's that's a car full of Al

gave him who's there drunken teenagers I

wish who doesn't love them come on don't

just stand there get in it's rutting

season this is exciting we're going to

uh probably yeah a world premiere

something wrong coach talk to me the

battery's dead I thought your friend was

getting you a new one Oh Kevin

some friend you wanted me to pay for it

I want to go home I don't coach coach

you're missing the big picture here I

have to get to that movie all right

there's a convenience store about ten

minutes down the road I'll go call for a

tow truck be here in 15 minutes 15

minutes you guys wait here you're gonna

leave a bunch of kids alone in the car

yeah

not the first time Oh movie starting

I'll be fired from writing reviews oh

brother there's a midnight showing Jason

I wouldn't be able to stay awake if I

Brendon what if I tickled to you oh geez

just me open up jump is 50 bucks

buddy right right I got it I got it

what's your name Tina Tina nice

wait you're not tow truck Tina are you

that's what it says on my uniform I read

about you I have your calendar you're

amazing yeah yeah fifty bucks

there's a hundred Wow tow truck Tina

can't even believe it we signed this for

me sure you got a pen Brendan get in the

glove give me a pen right away you're

all sick wow I cannot believe it you

can't imagine how many times I've you

know I mean you know right people do

that

crank it yeah that start yeah yay thanks

Tina you were great and expensive can we

just go home now Hey look I'm sorry mr.

movie it'll make you feel better you can

blame me I'm doing it right now that's

not working

hmm that's too bad but now listen I

think we just all want to go home can't

we just drive around a little more

I'm kind of up oh well I hope you

learned your lesson tonight young man I

sure did learn my lesson mom if I do

anything wrong you will rub my head yes

I understand

Wow okay what other lesson did you learn

Brendon don't uh don't do things it'll

come to me Oh

that movie sucked I like this you liked

it I liked all the violence it surprised

me uh hamburger cut I was thinking maybe

there is something I can do for you oh

yeah how about I suspend you for a week

with hey now you're talking welcome to

the dark side Lynch and in my opinion

Picasso was the worst painter I ever saw

in my life and in my opinion tango and

cash was the best buddy caught picture

ever doctor's foot and Mel sir but how

did you cure him twas easy I told him

that everybody's opinion matters I told

him that too but it didn't work yes but

didn't I told it to him a couple more

times that's why you made a big bucks

you know books do you like oh this is

the worst ending ever uh a my opinion

this is the worst movie ever

Brenda well how do we end it just shut

off the camera that works uh no it

didn't

a lot hey who wants a wine cooler

Jason where'd you get wine coolers

here's a

please be in here please be in here

please be in here yes yes yes

until a qualified principle can be found

mr. lunch will take over as interim

principal mr. lunch Hobbit bread